Magic's Place in Camelot
by Miss-L-Fox
Summary: Oneshot: Perhaps my father was wrong, perhaps the old ways aren't as evil as we thought. So what should we do? Accept magic, or let Mordred die? The question was Merlin's undoing. An alternate ending to 5x05.


Arthur's question was unexpected. "How did you know this place was sacred?" The king didn't even turn to look at his servant as his eyes surveyed the treetops.

Merlin blinked at the forest around him, "Well it's obvious…" and to him it was.

"Pretend it isn't."

"Everything here… so full of life. Every tree… every leaf… every insect. It's as if the world is vibrating. As if everything is much more than it seems." Arthur gazed in surprise at his manservant. His voice was distant and soft, very different from any tone that he had heard uttered by the man. Merlin's eyes gazed at the trees around him with a soft kind of reverence and understanding, a peace coming from his very core, as if this place was more home to him than the halls of Camelot.

"You feel all that?" Arthur's tone was sharp, as he faced this unknown version of his best friend.

Merlin's eyes turned to him, confusion in their blue depths, "Don't you?" The question struck the king. It wasn't said in a tone of condescension or ridicule, it was sad. All he could do was shake his head, and watch as a half smile flickered across the wise idiot's face before it faded and Merlin once more distanced himself from him in a way that had become infuriatingly familiar over the past weeks. There was a sadness in the man that shook the blonde to the core.

"What will you do?" Arthur had lost count of the times Merlin had asked him that question, but this was not like those other times. This question lacked the determination that usually underlied it. Merlin was just as lost as he himself was.

"I don't know…" Merlin watched the king's eyes focus on the flames as his inner indecision bubbled to the surface. "My heart says to do anything I can to save Mordred, but I've seen what misery unfettered sorcery brings. Before my father outlawed magic, Camelot was almost destroyed by a sorcerer. In my own time Morgana's used it for nothing but evil…" The vise on Merlin's heart tightened further. Mordred, both a friend and foe, lay dying while he had the power to save him, but to save him was to kill Arthur. "What would you do in my place?"

Arthur's eyes were trusting as he turned them on his manservant and Merlin inwardly cringed. He did not deserve such a look as he was being given, not now. "Me? I'm just a lackey… maker of beds." He hoped to not have to do this, praying to whoever would listen that this opening would distract Arthur from asking for his opinion. He didn't think his soul would survive this choice before him.

Arthur eyed his servant curiously, the servant had never failed to bring him the wisest advice when he needed it, even if he did not wish to hear it, but now the servant remained silent, acting unworthy, "Even lackeys can be wise." Silence reigned as Arthur's confusion rose and devastation raged within the warlock. Finally the king broke the silence, "It's not like you to be silent…"

"Camelot's future is at stake," was the response the blonde received as Merlin's eyes cast downward. Arthur nearly wanted to scoff; Camelot's future was always at stake and that had never stopped the boy before, if anything it made him more determined to give his opinion.

However, this decision was far too important to let this discussion digress into an argument. "And a man's life."

Merlin gave the only answer he could, "You must protect Camelot. You must protect the world you've spent your life building." The world that I have been protecting you to create, he added in his mind. "A just and fair kingdom for all…"

"You'd have me sacrifice a friend."

"I would have you become the king you're destined to be…" Merlin's answer was close to one he had heard many times, but gone was the assurance and joy that came with it. For a moment Arthur wondered what had changed Merlin so, he was no longer the man he had known. He had once been a man of light and hope, but now he seemed an old man whose life had been full of despair.

He leaned forward, hoping to glimpse the passionate man he knew, "If I do save Mordred, all my father's work will be for nothing, sorcery will reign once more in Camelot. Is that what you'd want?" Arthur's eyes locked with the brunettes and he watched as a pain shot through those eyes like he'd never seen. Merlin was dying from the inside out. As the silence began he felt the need to fill it with anything, "Perhaps my father was wrong, perhaps the old ways aren't as evil as we thought. So what should we do? Accept magic, or let Mordred die?" Arthur could feel it. This was a moment that would decide his future. He watched as his best friend before him warred with himself, tears filling his eyes like he had only seen a handful of times before. What answer he was waiting for he did not know.

Merlin cast his tormented eyes down toward the flames. Arthur sat before him so open. In any other circumstances this would be the moment. He was looking toward his best friend to give him courage and strength as he had countless times before, but not this time. Merlin had no courage to give. His was gone. He steadied himself with the fact nothing was worth Arthur's life. As long as Arthur lived he had not failed his destiny. He had done this before, he could do it now. He knew the words that he must say, what he must do.

There can be no place for magic in Camelot… Even as he opened his mouth to utter the lie something surged through him and his mouth clamped shut. The forest around him screamed in his mind and his entire soul writhed in agony. He lifted his eyes once more to remind himself why he must betray himself in such a way, but as he met Arthur's eyes he realized, this was the moment that Albion would begin. Everything he had waited for, worked for, now sat before him awaiting an answer. Arthur was ready, he was facing his destiny for the first time with an open mind and heart. Merlin broke.

Arthur watched as blue eyes closed. His eyebrows scrunched in confusion at the continued silence before Merlin held out his palm before him. When the warlock's eyes opened they were not blue but gold and bubble of blue light appeared above his palm.

The king leapt to his feet, pressing his back against the trunk of the tree he had been lounging against. Of any answer Merlin could have given, this was not one he was prepared for. The terrified king's hand landed instinctually on the hilt of his sword and he watched as despair filled his friend's eyes. Golden eyes closed and the hand lowered, light extinguishing; the boy, however, remained silent.

Merlin's head bowed forward in defeat. He had been wrong. He had ensured not only Arthur's death, but his own as well. He had failed.

"You… have magic…" It wasn't a question so Merlin could not bring himself to answer; he simply lowered his head further. Arthur's eyes were wide and wild as he stared down at this… sorcerer? The bumbling servant that tripped over his own feet had magic? Then suddenly, it made sense.

"YOU IDIOT!" he couldn't help but yell as it all fell into place. His hand flew from his sword hilt as he began pacing on his side of the fire, not daring to turn to look at his servant turned magic user for fear he might shake the man.

Merlin jolted in surprise at the king's sudden outburst. His eyes scanned the clearly fuming man and oddly found no threat, simply frustration. "Sire?" he ventured hesitantly.

"NO! You don't get to talk right now!" the king's fiery gaze turned on the meek man still seated on the ground and he stalked toward him like a predator. "Are you so hell bent on dying? You have magic so you move to Camelot? Not only that but then you sign up to be the prince's manservant? You used magic when you saved my life all those years ago, didn't you? And all those adventures where we survived by the skin of our teeth and luck? No one is that lucky! I should have known! I barely survived half of the things we did and somehow an untrained servant walks away from every one with hardly a scratch? How could I have not known? How could no one have noticed?" he bellowed at the sky. He took a deep breath before bringing his eyes back to the nearly quivering man before him.

"Why would you do it? Everything you must have gone through? Everything my father did, that I said? I could have been just like him! I'm sure some evil person offered you a chance, an offer of greater treatment and riches than what Camelot held for you!" Arthur's tone was quite now, filled with something Merlin couldn't place, "Why did you stay in Camelot?"

Merlin blinked again and uttered for the second time that night, "It's obvious…" in his mind there was never a question of leaving, of betraying Camelot.

A jolt of shock ran through the sorcerer as the king's lips pulled up at the corners for a fraction of a second, "Pretend it isn't." The tone held something familiar but Merlin dare not hope yet and cast his eyes to the dirt.

"You." The simple statement hung in the air. Arthur felt all frustration leave him, leaving him only with exasperation and awe for the man still seated before him. Merlin's eyebrows furrowed as he stared down at the ground, "I believe in you, I always… well almost always have. I believe in the kingdom you will create and the person you are and who you will become." He mustered his courage and turned his eyes to his king.

"You idiot…" there was a look of affection in the blonde's eyes as he offered his hand to his friend. For now, that was answer enough for the King.

* * *

Arthur stuck his sword into the ground, striding confidently into the cave. Merlin followed quietly behind him, a silent reassurance to the king. He no longer held any doubt; this was the path he was meant to take. A path that would not bring his kingdom to ruin as he originally feared, but one that would lead him to be the king that he was always meant to be.

"You have returned," the Disir greeted in a flat tone. "Is your decision made?"

The king held his head high and his shoulders straightened, "It is."

"What is your decision young king?"

"It seems that even while my father ruled there was magic at the heart of Camelot, guiding and guarding it. Now, it is my decision to no longer keep it locked in the shadows where it has hidden. I agree to your offer. The old religion shall regain its freedom in Camelot."

"So you have learned son of Uther, of the silent guardian who has given so much to protect you?"

"I have, and I will protect him just as he has protected me."

A bone chilling laugh echoed from the three women. "Very well Arthur Pendragon, King of Camelot. Your repentance has been heard. Return to your kingdom and rule it well."

Arthur gave a nod of farewell to the trio before turning to exit, catching Merlin's watery eyes and shining smile. He offered a smile in return and began the trek out of the cave.

'Emrys,' Merlin's eyes raised to the three figures as they called to his mind. 'You chose well young Emrys. Had Arthur rejected us he would have sealed his fate. He would fall and Albion would never come to be. The path you had seen would have been fulfilled. You still have many trials ahead, some that may still destroy what you are trying to build, but know this, the ivy that would have once choked the tree shall now help it grow, fear no longer of the druid boy. He shall be a great ally in the trials to come. Goodbye… Emrys.'

* * *

Merlin's heart soared, it was free in a way that it hadn't in years. He stepped out of the cave to find the king, his king, mounted and waiting for him. They hadn't spoken since the night before, and the warlock knew that at some point in the near future he would have to lay his past bare before the king, but somehow that all faded as everything finally settled into place. He had made the right decision for what felt like the first time since before he had poisoned Morgana. He had told Arthur… Arthur knew, and had accepted him. He was free!

Arthur watched his manservant leave the cave, a spring in his step and the goofy smile on his face. A light he hadn't seen in some time was back in the servants eyes and the king was glad for it. They may still have trials before them, and he may learn things about his friends past that might hurt, but he knew, whatever destiny , fate, or whatever threw their way they would be ready, standing side by side, in the way they always had though he had never realized.

The Once and Future King and Emry, the most powerful warlock to ever live, who could stand against them and succeed?

End

AN: In that silent spot where Merlin was making his decision I completely thought that it was going to be the moment that Merlin FINALLY told Arthur, imagine my disappointment at what ACTUALLY came out of his mouth, so here is my one shot dedicated to what could have been.


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